An Event that changed my life forever

It had been about 2-3 months since my nephew had died and life was getting back to normal and i was still leading my second life, learning about Islam.

At this stage i knew i wanted to be a Muslim but i just couldnt find the strength to do it, i knew that it would be hard for me and my family whom i love so dearly.

I felt so alone in life, i would sleep at night and my heart would ache. But i soldiered on and put on a happy face. I prayed to God so many time, at night i would talk to Him and ask for a way out, for help, for Him to make it easy..

My Auntie Jeannie was pregnant with her fourth child, a baby girl :D its was so exciting the thought of having another baby around. It was just by chance that two of my aunties (sisters) were both due around the same time.

September, cant remember the exact date but my aunty leslie had a baby boys on the monday, then on the tuesday or wednesday my aunty jeannie had her daughter. Mashallah what an exciting time.. two babies in the family in less then a week. It was so exciting.. At the time my mum and bothers were my the coast with my aunt jeannie cause she had been really sick from this pregnancy, so my mum went to help out for the last few weeks of her pregnancy.

Im sitting in the car with my friend Ruby and my phone rings, its my mum. She tells me your aunt is being flown down to Sydney because she in a critical condition... huh said, what do u mean, i dont understand? My mum said, she ok but they want to send her to Sydney so she can get better treatment.. The baby is okay, my mum says to me. i asked is she going to be okay, my mum assured me that she will be alright but the sound of her voice wasnt assuring at all...

i didnt know what was wrong, just that it was something to do with having the baby... So my mum suggest that i call her on her mobile before she gets on to the helicopter... hhmmm okay then.

i started to tell my friend about what was going on, and we got carried away in conversation. and before i knew it, it was too late to call her... 'oh well', i thought, there is always tomorrow. Ill call her or visit her tomorrow..

I stayed out pretty late that night, till about 2:30 in the morning. My girlfriend dropped me off at my mum and step dads house which was my 2nd home after my dads house. I jumped on the computer and surfed the net which became a habit of mine..